49 years and 11 months, today

One month from today, my parents will celebrate their 50th anniversary. My brothers and sisters and I are planning a big party for them. I've actually put my special event planner hat on and have been having blast with this party (think spread sheets and budgets and a planning binder!).

It will be at the ballroom of a hotel in Syracuse, and we've invited almost 80 people. I have a formal program all worked out for the night -- presentations and toasts. My oldest sister is producing a video from pictures that everyone sent us. One niece is singing, her sister is dancing. My youngest niece and nephew are reading a poem. And I got a picture signed by Cal Ripken Jr., congratulating them on "18,263 consecutive days of marriage." We even have a quasi-celebrity as the master of ceremony -- a local news anchor who went to high school with my dad.
All my out-of-town siblings and their families are flying home -- so for my parents, their eight children with their seven spouses (yes, poor l'il ole Ellie is the only single one), the eight grandchildren, plus the husband and child of a grand-daughter. So really, half of the 80 invited are just immediate family!

The only black eye on the whole thing is my sister Sue. I don't want her to come. And I know that's selfish, because not only is she my sister, but she is their daughter, too. And this is for them. But I feel uncomfortable around her. She never comes to anything. It's like she's a stranger -- but not, because she's my sister.

The last time I saw her was last fall, at my great-uncle's birthday dinner. She came up and hugged me. I was taken aback and slightly offended. Because it felt like some stranger invading my personal space. And what was I supposed to say, "hmmm... nice of you to come to this family event." And before seeing her, knowing that she was going to be there, I had minor anxiety about it. Why? I'm not really sure. Maybe because it's outside of my comfort zone.

We've been betting, amongst the seven of us, whether she and Frank are really going to show. On one hand, how could they not? But then, I've said that before about other family ocassions. And they never showed up.

If this was Vegas, and we were truly betting, I think the odds would be pretty good that they'll show. She e-mailed me the other day -- not in response to the e-mail I sent reminding her that she needed to send her share of the party money by November 1, and certainly not the one whose subject line read "info needed, please respond" -- but rather to RSVP for her mother-in-law, and then added, "of course, Frank and I will be there, too."

Of course.