An Apology

B: do you have a minute right now?
ellie: sure
B: are you and I ok? (we can talk about this later / in person / not at all - but I wanted to ask)
ellie: we're fine
ellie: but we can talk about it if you want
B: Clearly our friendship seems to have been affected to some degree, and I'm sad about that
ellie: i think to some degree, but to a minor degree
ellie: honestly i still adore you
B: and I you
B: I apologize for anything I did to make things more uncomfortable - I'm a complete moron when it comes to that
ellie: you're just a boy (and I mean that in the best possible way)
ellie: clearly i have a need to take care of people
ellie: and sometimes that gets me in trouble in my own head and the way i take my feelings too far
ellie: and you’re so easy to take care of
B: and I have no cautionary filters in my behavior
B: hehe
ellie: exactly
B: I kind of just want to hug you and see you smile
ellie: thanks
B: I really love having you as my friend
ellie: me too
B: ok - I'm glad I said something
ellie: me too
B: now I'm all verklempt or however the fuck you spell that
ellie: let's plan to have lunch or something soon
B: ok
B: I would like that -- hug* thanks again
ellie: thanks for bringing it up -- i never would have :-)
B: :-)
ellie: and oh by the way...
ellie: i'm normal
B: how do you mean? hehe
ellie: jenn told about your conversation
B: which? (I'm still not clicking in)
ellie: that i try to think i'm normal, but i'm not, that i’m more altnerative or something, and that think that people at work don't think you're as alternative as you are
ellie: ring a bell?
B: hehe
ellie: yea, i'm normal
ellie: and you used to be alternative...
B: I think I said that you have a side that you don't show at work
ellie: that is until you bought the family wagon
B: haha
B: it's because I'm a rock star baby
B: I need to tote my goods
B: I am alternative
B: I am I am
B: hehe
ellie: yes you are
ellie: and i'm the epitamy of normal
ellie: like Donna Reed normal
ellie: i could so have a house in the ‘burbs, two kids, CEO husband
ellie: it's just that i'll be jenna jameson in the bedroom
B: hahaha
B: that is wonderful
B: for some reason the word normal bothers me
B: I don't think of you that way
ellie: thanks
B: how about special?
ellie: ok
B: in this day and age you are very special ;-)
ellie: aaah thanks
B: :-)