Apparently, I'm Hot

Too many things to report on. My vacation is almost over -- I go back to work tomorrow.

Some conversational highlights from the wedding between me and my boys from college:

Me: "i can't believe you didn't recognize me."
Coach: "it took me a minute, i haven't seen you in 10 years."
Me: "i look almost exactly the same."
Coach: "no you don't. you were cute in college."
Bruno: "you're hot now."

** ** ** ** ** ** **

Me: "i need another drink."
Bruno: "oh you're going to be a problem, aren't you?"
Me: "am i showing too much cleavage?"
Bruno: "oh you're definitely going to be a problem."

** ** ** ** ** ** **

Dave: "you're not married?"
Me: "no."
Dave:" no boyfriend?"
Me: "nope."
Dave: "fiancee?"
Me (shaking my head): "nope"
Dave: "no boyfriend, no fiancee, no husband. how is that possible?"
Me: "that's the million dollar question."
Dave: promise you're not lying, 'cuz i'm about to kiss you."

** ** ** ** ** ** **

Me, leaving Brownie my first voice mail: "i can't believe you're not here. i miss you -- you should be here for michael's wedding."

Me, leaving Brownie a second voice mail: "you're such a pussy, i can't believe you're not here. i love you, though. but you're still a pussy."

** ** ** ** ** ** **

The next day...at my brother's...

Reuben: "get over here."
Me: "what?"
Reuben: "what's that on your neck?"
Me: "i don't know what you're talking about."
Reuben: "the mark, on your neck."
Me: "it's a birthmark, i've always had it."
Reuben: "bullshit."